6 Reasons To Be Happy And Grateful

Hi!

Not going to make this long but this is just to make you realise that you should be grateful for what you have after all the struggles I have been facing in Bangladesh

1. You have a family, friends or someone that cares for you.

2. You have clean water, 24/7 electricity, Wi-Fi and clean air.

3. You have an amazing education system and amazing healthcare.

4. You have every kind of food available near you.

5. The weather is bearable.

6. Most important one. You are not poor!


Be thankful for what you have


Take care

Yours, Nafiza

When You Have Guests In Bangladesh

Hello!


Hope you are doing well! I'm not! I spent a day without my voice, hit my leg quite hard, had a poisonous insect bite me in the neck twice, huge face breakout, the kitchen heat and this heat itself killing me everyday. I'm pretty sure I'm getting bitten by the ants right now. But that's just my personal struggle like everyone...

First of all... I know I made a similar post months ago. However, this is quite different to the one I posted before. That one was when you have guests in a Bengali house abroad. For me that would be having guests in London. This one is about when you have short time guests in a house in Bangladesh. When I say short time I mean probably like for an hour or 2. We had guests today so I learnt about the steps that happen when you have guests. This is what happens...


1. Knowing They Are Coming

Whoever wants to come will call someone at home to let them know they will be coming over. When they say they are coming they do not expect to have lunch or dinner, they tend to come for tea and chatter. In some instances someone from the house will call them to come over for tea and chatter. This is most likely to be for neighbours as the neighbours in Bangladesh tend to be quite close like friends. Some people inform when they left the house and it is chaotic if anyone does that. The life of the people in the house instantly becomes hell.


2. Preparing Snacks

It is disrespectful to have a guest leave the house without even serving them a glass of water or a cup of tea/coffee. So obviously almost everyone will be helping each other in making the snacks or whatever they'd like to serve. The tea/coffee comes later as it gets cold and you know they are better warm. At the end you all end up gathering a fair amount of food for the guests.

3. The Arrival

They arrive, you greet, they greet. They all sit down and start talking but not too much because some of it needs to be saved for later of course. At first everyone is together in the living room,but women tend to like it segregated from men so they go to a separate room and settle and chat there comfortably rather than with a bunch of men. Other members are introduced to the guests and all those formalities that usually happen when you meet someone new.


4. Serving The Snacks

This is the time when you make use of those fancy plates and cutlery. You take them out, wash them and use them to serve the food you made earlier. You have to serve them separately as the men and women are in separate places. You serve the men first and then the women. You serve them in those fancy trays and hand them the food in person to be more respectful. The last thing a Bengali family wants is an angry guest leaving the house getting a bunch curses. In such families, others come first before you. Being selfish is not going to work in big families in Bangladesh.

5. The Farewell

They leave after some time of chatter. This again takes a good half an hour because they will start new conversations and then the same "You will have to come to my house next" kind of conversations. The farewell is a thing itself. You accompany them outside till the door and they finally leave.

6. Clearing Up

Since they left, you clear up the dishes and you have a bite of the remaining snacks together. You do not want to let food go to waste. You give a bit to everyone. have a little bit yourself, clean that up and rest for a while. Everyone at home will take a breather together and then will carry on with their normal life during the day.


This is not my imagination but what I really faced today. Hope you enjoyed it. If you have any suggestions about my upcoming blogs, let me know! I have decided that from today till the 14th September 2016, I am going to blog only on Saturdays. I will hopefully resume back to my twice a week blogs from that day. This is because my days are getting hectic and Internet in Bangladesh is rubbish. So stay tuned every Saturdays.

Take Care

Yours, Nafiza

4 Strange Things You Will Encounter In Bangladesh

Hey!

By now you have realised that I'm finding Bangladesh so strange even though I'm only back after 2 years. So, from everything I am observing, these are 5 strange (as I feel) and random things you will encounter in Bangladesh!

1. Links/power/authority

Let me explain...

In Bangladesh, some stuff cannot be done the simple way. For example, some roads do not allow auto rikshaws and it is not humanly possible to walk in the roads of Bangladesh. What would you do? You take your parents (mainly your dad) and let you in the road. This is because my dad is probably friends with some high status people that the road guards are scared of. You want to get into the ferry first? You say you are friends with whoever with high status. If you have links, it is really easy to get work fast. The current thing that works now is by saying you are from Gopalgonj. Why? In my previous posts I may have explained that the current PM of Bangladesh is from Gopalgonj, so by being from where the PM is, it is a big thing in Bangladesh. 

2. Bargaining

Unless it is a shop that clearly says "FIXED PRICE" or it is a supermarket, you are free to bargain and in some instances mildly blackmail. You go to a shop and the salesmen will show you a huge range of their products. You pick one or two and then you ask for the price. He will tell you a price and you are bound to say it is too much. You say a price and he will tell you it is too cheap and a loss for their business. Then you say "you give it for this price or I'm leaving". He will either be nice to you and give it to you or he won't. Or you will both agree to a price that's in the mid range. Say if a fabric costs £18 and you say £15, you will probably come to an agreement of paying £16-£17. Some shop owners are so horrible they will not listen you and will overcharge and not reduce the price. Most of the time they have the good quality products and you have to go back to him. I don't bargain because my parents do it for me. I have done small bargains but the whole thing is a shameful act in my opinion.

3. Maids

Back in the days, they were nice and simple girls. Nowadays they are too advanced, probably have a cheap touchscreen phone that has Facebook in it and buy 100 MB for 44 pence just to get on "FB" (aka Facebook). They do help with household work and it makes bengali people's lives easier. But sometimes they do a bit of work and they overcharge. I heard in Dhaka, they charge £5 for one task. For example, making roti is £5, sweeping and moping the floor another £5, cooking another £5 and so on. But I think this is monthly. When I was young, they used to do so much work at my grans house, and now they do a bit of work and just run away, not to mention they don't come at all at the slightest rain. 

4. Transportation

Rule of thumb! Do not take the bus in Bangladesh!!! Don't ask me why but don't. The main thing is to get the auto rikshaws and the normal rikshaws. Normal ones are open air and fit 2 normal sized or 3 small people or 1 big person. Auto rikshaws fit 4-6 people and you can go "reserve" or in groups with random people going to the same place and that is generally cheaper than going reserve. Price of this varies upon your destination. Somewhere close like your local bazaar would be 20p and somewhere far like 20 minute ride would be 70p. All in cash of course. Bengali residents think it is expensive but I get why they say that. Salary in Bangladesh is really low.

Hope you enjoyed this post and make sure to check back every Wednesday and Saturday.

I feel like I should reduce to one blog a week. Since the past few weeks, I have had a feeling that my effort is being less appreciated and I may have become a "spam" around my social media. It may be just me but I felt like sharing it because we're friends. If I think or feel that my time and effort is being wasted, I will completely stop blogging. I love to blog and want to but not for the ghost, Please don't assume I am bashing, blackmailing or forcing you to read my content. this is just me sharing my thoughts. It is upto you what you want to read and what not. Let me know what you think about this...

Take Care,

Yours, Nafiza

5 Perks Of Living In A Joint Family

Hey!

If this did not come out on Saturday, I'd like to apologise about it. I'm on holidays in a city where there is hardly any Internet connection and so communication with anyone over the Internet has been a struggle. If it comes out on Saturday, forget what I just said.

Anyway. I am currently on holidays in a city called Faridpur, as I mentioned in my last blog. I am in my dad's friend's house and they're a joint family. This made me realise that not all joint families are bad as they're portrayed in media and TV.
These people are so nice and the aunts are so close to each other. No need to mention the brothers can't live without each other and their parents who are looked after really well.

These are 5 perks of living in a joint family!

1. You're never lonely

It depends on how big the family is or how many brothers live together. Most of the time it's big and you are not lonely. You always have someone to speak to.

2. You don't do the work alone

Because most of the guys are married. All the ladies will work together to get through the day. Better than doing all the work alone and you get the work done quicker.

3. You make a great and strong relationship with everyone

They're your everything. You can't live without them. None of them can live without each other because you're so close.

4. Someone (in fact) everyone is with you and support you all the time

They will definitely be there when you need them. In return, you will always be there for them when they need you.

5. You get to eat good food most of the time

It's a big, joyous family. They like to eat well with everyone and spend a great time together however much time they get during the day. An aunt from this family told me that they make good food majority of the days of a week.

Sorry it's short, but a sweet post for today. Hope you liked it and make sure to check back every Wednesday and Saturday.

Take care


Yours, Nafiza

A Life Changing Experience: A Trip To My Village

Hello!


It feels like it has been forever since I last blogged. I did not realise I would have such a busy schedule where I would not find time to blog. To be honest, I do not even get time to check social media. One way this is good because I am learning to live life offline and it is amazing. Since I have been offline, I have been able to experience life to the fullest in my village for 4 days.

More about my roots:

No doubt I am from Bangladesh (born in Spain). However, that explains nothing. In our culture, when we are asked what district we are from, we have to say where our dads are from. In my case, I have to say I am from Chandradighalia, Gopalgonj. Gopalgonj is where the PM of Bangladesh is from. But she is from Tungipara, Gopalgonj. I know it's hard so basically she's from the neighbouring town. That is where I am from and I will always be no matter where I am born and where I live.

Back to the real point

This is how I spent 4 days in my village:


Day 1:

This is the day we went to Gopalgonj. We got our stuff and went to Gopalgonj. It is an hour drive from where I am currently staying. The drive to Gopalgonj is beautiful, if you ignore the fact that every driver in Bangladesh is careless and horrible. The scenery, the greenery, farms, lands, etc, it is amazing. I also learnt that my dad knows a lot of the stuff we saw on our way. I got to see a glimpse of one of the biggest eye hospitals in Bangladesh, the constructions for the biggest pharmaceutical companies by the Japanese, Gopalgonj University and so much more. We arrive and we stayed at the urban area of Gopalgonj, where my dad's brother lives. They were amazing hosts and got to try fresh veggies, meat and fish (even though I am not a fish lover). We got to eat fresh chicken, duck and this veggie called "Kochu". In fact, we got to try that a lot, almost everyday.

We arrived, looked around my uncle's area and went to another uncle's house.


Day 2:

My dad invited all of his family. He invited his brothers and sisters and their families. My dad has 3 sisters (one passed away before my parents got married) and 4 brothers (5 including him). The sons and daughters of the first sister who is no more came, the other remaining 2 sisters came with their sons and daughters and one uncle came. The event was at the 2nd uncle's house so the 4th uncle came with his family and then it was my dad and us family/ My 1st and 3rd uncle did not attend as one of them is in Dhaka (capital and far away) and the other one is outside Bangladesh My dad got chefs to cook for everyone and they cooked biryani and chicken korma. It was delicious even though I am also not fond of biryani. They all came and had lunch together. I got to see them and talk to them. I also saw how my dad's 2 sisters are still so close to each other. They were attached to each other the whole time and as far as I know, they do not tend to see each other a lot. Everyone also took pictures together (I fell asleep and my mum didn't call me so I missed it, it was so sad). My mum's family (the people I am currently staying with in Khulna city) joined us in the evening and they also got to meet everyone. It was an overwhelming experience. At night, they all started to leave one by one so the excitement was over.

Day 3:

BEST DAY EVER!
We went to Chandradighalia, my village. This is where my dad grew up in his childhood. It was a 15-20 minute drive from my uncle's house. We went there and saw the houses where my grandparents used to live. On the way I got to see my grandfather's grave. It was quite emotional as I have never seen him. I also saw the neighbours of my grandparents and the man who currently takes care of my grandparents' houses. A bit away it was my grandmother's grave. It is hard to reach because right now it is the Barsha (rainy) season so it formed into a lake. We used my grandfather's handmade boat to reach to my grandmother's grave. The boat ride was super fun but super scary because the boat was quite deep down almost to the water level. The closer I was getting to her grave, the more emotional and nostalgic I was getting. When I got close, I could not hold back my tears because she passed away when I was quite young so I did not realise her loss bur now I do. As I am writing this, I am in tears because it keeps reminding me of how my dad explained her last breath and that scenario keeps appearing in front of me as if I was present at that time. I prayed for her a lot. I did not take pictures of the grave out of respect. We got back on the boat and rested at my cousin's who lives in the house beside my grandparents', just for a bit.

We left my village and went to my dad's sister's house (aka my aunt's). We saw my uncle who is supposed to be quite ill as he's quite elderly but Alhamdulillah he was fine because he was really happy to see us. He is so cute. We rested there as they finished cooking for us. They served us the village style and it was dope. My aunt's husband usually does not move from his bed. Out of joy, he got up and sat down to chat with my parents. He was really having fun and so was I seeing him so nice Masha'Allah. They gave us a ton of fresh fruits from their plants and trees and we went back to my uncle's place.

My cousin's father-in-law came to invite us over to his house the day after so I spoke to him for a bit since it's the first time I met him. My cousin then took me to 2 of their neighbours' houses and I almost forgot about them. They were so nice, it was nice to see them after so long as well.

At night, my 4th uncle invited us for dinner so we went. I saw my dad, my uncle and my 2 aunties having serious conversations about their family matters (which I rather not share online because it is family matters and it is confidential). After that we had dinner and went to see my dad's 2nd or 3rd cousin. I have not seen this uncle for almost 10 years so it was awesome to see him and his family again after so long. We got back pretty long and you'd imagine I fell asleep as soon as we got home. NO! My cousin kept me awake till 3:00-3:30 am to chat with her.

Day 4:

We packed our stuff to get ready to go back home. My dad instructed us that we should pack in a way that we come back from my cousin's in-laws house, collect our bags and leave. We got ready and went to their house. It was a rainy day and it was very muddy. Wearing fancy clothes, you can imagine it's hard to cross muddy and dirty roads. We arrived there and they were amazing hosts. They served us so well and I got to meet my brother-in-law for the first time but not for long because he came for lunch from work. We had lunch, chatted and all the stuff you usually do when you're at someone's house for lunch or dinner. We left a bit before evening, got our bags and left my village.


Basically it was the best 4 days out of the whole Bangladesh trip. It is not the only place I have only been to since I have arrived here. I have been to Mongla and in the next few days I'm going to Foridpur and Kuakata.

I strongly encougare you to go out and explore your roots. Thanks to my parents, I have been able to explore my roots and I'm glad I did.

Here is a gallery from my trip to my village:

I hope you enjoyed this post and I have been able to give an insight of my amazing experience with my words. Make sure to check back every Wednesday and Saturday night (although some days I might not blog because as I mentioned above, busy schedule). 

Take care, 

Yours, Nafiza

Travelling Abroad

Hi guys!

By now you probably know that I am in Bangladesh for holidays. Of course that means I had to travel for a ridiculous amount of time and it got all of us exhausted. I wanted to share with you lovely people the process of travelling abroad and more specifically travelling to Bangladesh and what you encounter and feel like through the process of travelling.

1.     1. Travel to the airport

Nothing too hassling. Just pick up your bags, put them in the car, sit in the car and just go. The only annoying thing about travelling to the airport is the bags. This is because when you are Asian and have a family like mine, you travel with 12 bags and they are sure as hell.

     2. Travel to country of transit (if it’s not a direct flight)

By now you get through customs, security and all that nonsense. You are in a place surrounded by strangers. You are seating in the most uncomfortable seat and no damn position is helping you to get comfortable. Either way, you fly and things get not as normal as when you are on the ground. You are in the air with strangers and a specific amount of oxygen. The food they serve you is very strange for some reason even though it is normal food for normal people. I personally like airplane food but everyone has mixed opinions about this. Water is also provided in a specific amount. The last 30 minutes do not just end at all. Every second of that half an hour is too long. Finally, the plane lands at the last 5-10 minutes and what do you hear around? People are clapping! This wasn’t your son’s graduation ceremony please!

3.      3. Travel to the actual country

If your flight isn’t direct, you are stuck in a transit. This experience varies for everyone. Some people get long transit hours like 12 hours, some get very short like 1 hour and some decent like 4 hours. I got 1 hour. So you know that if someone saw me at Istanbul airport, they saw me running around to catch the connecting flight to Dhaka. Thank God I got that flight and now you are surrounded around other kinds of people. Bear in mind these people are going Bangladesh as well. So a variety of people is a must to see. In front of me was a loudmouth who apparently knows it all and thinks that “you should get an ultrasound scan if you break your bones”. On my right was my family and on my left, the whole column was a huge family with a ton of children. You know children means crying, hitting and a lot of chatter. Hence why half of my journey I spent it sleepless. The man in front of me kept talking non-stop to his neighbour (even after my dad requesting him to keep it quite because I couldn’t sleep) and the family on my left kept making noise including a lady who interrupted the way to the toilet. Again the last 30 minutes are not ending but we land at the end. Surprisingly no one clapped this time. You get off, get through customs, collect your bag and be ready for the next journey.

4.      4. Travel to the final destination

By now you have passed immigration before everyone because “your cousin’s wife’s brother in law works in customs and immigration” so I am thankful for getting this quick pass. Usually I help my dad when collecting the “8 bags” (4 are handbags) from the belt. I didn’t this time because I was exhausted due to the lack of sleep. We are out and our car is waiting for us outside with a family member. My fave uncle came to collect us and no pauses, we start the journey to my city. Dhaka is the capital of Bangladesh but I live in a city called Khulna and it’s a beautiful place. There is not a specific flight to Khulna from Dhaka so driving it is better and takes generally 6 hours if the conditions are fine. We took 11 hours. This is where the madness started. It took 3-4 hours to get a ferry because they made us stand in the queue, drive around the place for the gate, plead the people to let us in because somehow we are important and then get the ferry. The journey after getting off the ferry was the car breaking down, a lot of shaking due to the broken roads, speedy driving and praying that you reach your house without dying because of the dangerous and carelessly driving in the roads. People constantly horn and overtake each other. It was mad

At the end you are home, stinky, sweaty and it is all worth it when you see your family. So I would like to say that I have no regrets about the journey (only regret that my portable charger stopped working).

Did you ever experience such crazy journeys? Let me know in the comments below. Make sure to check back every late Wednesdays and Saturdays for amazing Bangladesh posts though August.

Take Care,

Yours, Nafiza